Crazy

I really don’t get it. How can people decide they are mad at you, “delete” you from their social sites and then send you junk email….

Is that a way for her to “win”

She’s crazy.

Lord, give me some aspirin

Sometimes I just want to grab my chest and start yelling the immortal words of the great Fred Sanford, “Oh my heart!!”

It just seems that every little possible thing happens all at once. I am just ready to SCREAM.

My husband and I went to his VA doctor today, and found out he’s pre-diabetic. That means he will develop full blown diabetes type 2 if we don’t get proactive. I’ve been researching a ‘better diet’ and he has begun to exercise but we will see how much he really wants to do this.

That isn’t the problem – I’m glad this happened because I know he needs a wake up call due to his weight. He’s been referred to a nutritionist and I’ll go with him to also learn. I mean – a good diet is a good diet. The problem is my daughter just can’t let it be about someone else.

She’s been seeing a shrink, and I know they’ve been working on this, but I am really not in the mood to be a loving caring mother right now. Sometimes I just need her to act like an adult.

Storm

The storm coming it behind my house!

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Why is it?

Why is it that once the tears come they can't stop? I mean really.  I'm still leaking.  That sucks.

Melting Down - Nuclear style

I managed to have a complete meltdown today. I don't know what exactly happened. I wish I did.

It would be easy to blame my husband - after all, it's what he said that set me off, but really it's my fault completely.

You see, my husband has been suffering with what I believe is stress related chest pains. We have a lot of stress in this house. I would let him know all about the issues of the day, and he was suffering for it. Knowing this may have been causing some of the issues, I stopped and it got better.

In short order, he stopped having the pains and things were better for him. The less I bothered him with things, the better he felt, but I kept getting sicker and sicker, but it didn't matter, as long as he was feeling better.

I guess I should have seen the signs, after all, I was sick all the time, tired all the time, I had a constant headache, even had a seizure, but still, I kept going.

Today he made a comment that I had been sitting on the couch for the past few days, and he was worried about me. I lost it. I have not been sitting on the couch all the time, but truly, as tired as I have been, I haven't been up to going anywhere or doing anything.

A complete and total meltdown. I was crying and babbling incoherently, shaking all over... I'm still crying...

Well, as Scarlet O'Hara said, tomorrow is another day, and I will pick up the pieces and start again...

A Comedy of Errors

My nephew, Brett, was on leave in Montana, visiting his mum and such. Anyway, he bought a car and drove home, taking him within about 1 hr of here.

I drove down to OKC to see him, and was planning to meat him at Toby Keith's Bar and Grill in Bricktown.

Alissa and I got to the restaurant at around 5pm, and got our name on the list. We had about 30 minutes, and so I called to see where Brett was. He was only about 20 minutes out - coolio!!!

Then he gets lost!!! I am finally able to ground guide him to Bass Pro, which is pretty darn close to Toby Keith's and he STILL can't find us.

Knowing he's in the parking lot, I sent Ali down to find him, and I let him him know what Ali is wearing and to look for her. Next thing I know, he's walking past me and OUT the door!!!

I got his attention by knocking on the door (meanwhile, our awesome server is laughing at me ) only to find out he didn't wait to find Alissa!!!

I know what you're thinking, you're thinking she always has her phone, call her.... NO! SHE LEFT HER PHONE ON THE TABLE!!

OK - so Brett took off, found her and brought her back.

CRAZY!!

Good news - Bretts a cheap date - he took the free meal for military. :)

Anyway, we traded his sword for my china and off he went. Poor guy!

Love that kid!

Pop in law

My father-in-law is sick again, he had to have surgery to remove a partial blockage in his colon, and then also had a hernia removed at the same time.

He's still in the hospital, and on morphine and cranky as all get out.

Hopefully he'll get of f the morphine soon, and get to go home soon....

and Then Comes the Tears

Today I went to PWOC.  I have been feeling emotional anyway, but today brought the tears. 

Dear Kellie told us the story surrounding her journey toward adoption, the adoption of her wonderful daughter and now her son.  She talked about the disappointment of being unable to conceive, having fertility treatments and then still having no results.

She spoke of the heartbreak of thinking they would be adopting, only to find out the birth-mother changed her mind, and finally, the joy of the children God has chosen for her family.

That was then followed by two moving songs, and the tears came. 

Things have been rough and sometimes sometimes things remind you of where your priorities need to be. 

Anyway, I cried.  With blotchy eyes, and red nose, I walked into our local convenience store and they were concerned that perhaps something horrible had happened. 

I explained what was going on, and smiled, telling them it's not much more than me being emotional.

My tears used to shame me, but you know, they don't any more.  Tears are an expression of the heart. 

Stuff and Junk

Today is Mom's birthday. I didn't get her anything. 

It's not that I forgot, it's because I got it in my head that there was 31 days in February.  I know, I know, that is just plain stupid.  There has never been 31 days in February, there isn't even 29 this year, but no... I knew I had two extra days to get online and buy something....

Yep, in case you're wondering, I did tell her.   What I didn't tell her is why.  I am pretty sure this had to do with my seizure. (I haven't told her about it, because it was only one and there isn't much to tell)  It seems that as well as losing names, I can't keep my calendar straight, however, numbers are easier.  

Strange huh??

How I got here

You know, it boggles the mind how different some people are after 20 years - especially me.

I've been FACEBOOKing for the last little while, several of the people who were in high school around the same time as I was have friended me. It  started with a couple of us  who were on myspace getting together, and then all of a sudden, I have so many I don't even know what to think. 

I love it.  We have all grown, we have all had trials, some have found love and lost it, and found it again, some have raised children, some have lost children, some have found success, some are still trying.  In the end, we have all grown up. 

I love my old high school friends.  I am so glad we can all laugh together, some of us can pray for one another.

I know there are some out there who have never gotten past their high school glory - but it doesn't seem to be anyone who are socializing with me. 

Love you all